Aesthetics vs bacon grease

“Look, it’s a pretty simple question,” Christian argued, his voice slightly slurred after his second martini of the evening, “do you want to worry about aesthetics, or do you want to explore new ways of incorporating bacon grease into food?” .. His reasoning was spot on and brutally honest. Why would I, my love for food and food aesthetics aside, worry about my pan sauce splitting when I had an unprecedented chance to see just what would happen taste wise if we were to drop the drippings from the fried, bacon-wrapped green beans into the sauce.. It was a losing battle and of course Christian’s reasoning came out on top.. After all, if the French finish the pan jus with butter, what was to keep us from finishing ours with bacon drippings.. Right?

The events leading up to Christian and I staggering around semi-intoxicated in my kitchen on a Saturday evening arguing about food aesthetics were a bit more complex than the decission to bring more cholesterol to the table. It all started out with a deeply rooted desire not to get drunk on this particular Saturday evening, leading into a plan to invite a few friends over for dinner. Throtteled by a couple of negative responses and some being abroad on the part of Emelie, we eventually ended up in a situation where only Christian and I were to meet up for a good dinner and a good bottle of wine.. Nothing could possibly go wrong, right?

Well, for starters, when shopping for dinner, I noticed a good deal on Sam Adams (one of my favorite import beers) and on Noilly Prat as well.. So I figured, what better way to start the day that with a nice beer and maybe a little dry Martini? Well, by the time we got around to standing around arguing about food preparation it was already too late. While the potatoes and bacon wrapped greens had been in the oven, we’d shared a few beers, a couple of HEALTHY martinis and the remainder of the cocktail shaker just for good measure.. We’d also popped open an awesome birthday present in the shape of a good, Californian red (thanks Tine!) which we consumed alongside our artery-clogging meal of rare steaks, cream sauce, roasted potatoes, greens and bacon.. Mmm..

The meal, more or less naturally, had to be followed by healthy sampelings of Ron Zacapa Centenario (soooo smooth) pitted against Gourry de Chadeville Très Vieux Cognac (soooo fruity) – regardless of how retarded sipping 20+ year old spirits in that state might’ve seemed.

Four hours into the ordeal, Christian had broken out the extra strong lagers and a half hour later, we were listening to to The Prodigy at a level that’s sure to have pissed off not only Brian upstairs, but probably the neighbours as well.. Another hour later and it was pretty much all over.. After some 17 units in less than five hours, Christian admitted defeat and staggered home. I staggered along for parts of the way. Having vowed to take care of Louises’s fishies for the weekend and being rather determined not to kill any of them off this time around, I decided I’d better feed them for the night before passing out and not knowing when I’d be capable of doing it the day after..

So much for that whole not getting drunk plan.. But at least we found out just what bacon drippings add to the party.. And we also discovered that they do in fact not make a pan sauce split.. Whether a combination of butter, pan drippings, red wine, cream and bacon grease is good for you is probably a whole nother discussion.


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