It’s been a long time coming

It’s been a while since I’ve done something wholly irresponsible.. And, frankly, in some weird way, I’ve kinda missed it.. Which is why I was kinda stoked when, Dunkel, for the sake of the good old times, suggested we got together Friday morning, had a few beers and waited to see what the day would bring.. Yeah, baby, count me in! Is there anything better to do on a Friday, really? Well, there probably is, but eh.. Sometimes it’s good to be just  a little bit irresponsible and/or dumb.

So, at around 10:30 AM, I headed down to Dunkel with a 20 pack in hand, excited to see what the day would bring. We initially killed some time, drinking a beer and watching Dunkel’s newest weird hobby – a fish tank – or a fish cage as I’ve grown to call it. We then walked down to a local pet shop to pick up a couple of apparently rare, but surprisingly small and rare fishies, that looked rather non.desrcript to me.. Which was probably mostly due to me thinking that if you have a fuck off large fish tank, you should get something large and impressive.. As in like a tuna or a small shart or something.. Not a bunch of little fishies that hide on the bottom and look like gravel.. But there are so many things that I don’t fully understand.

One thing I did understand, though, was getting back, drinking a few beers and listening to some heavy metal while the fishies adjusted to their new environment. This, in my book, was pretty good times. Dunkel even allowed me to help him introduce his new fishies to their new home which, of course meant, that I ended up nearly killing them and as a result decided to just sit down and drink a few more beers in safe distance of the tank.. Being careful not to not break, destroy or kill anything.. It’s really what I do best, staying in a corner, drinking beer and not hurting anybody or anything.

At around 3 PM, Under showed up for a beer and a bit of guitar jamming with Dunkel. Which is always good times for me even though I don’t play the guitar myself.. After all, what’s not to love about beers, guitar and distortion? He ended up staying for a few hours and much to my dismay at the time drinking only one beer.. Which I guess, in retrospect, was a pretty good thing because even if I did bring 20 beers and ended up finding an extra 4 in the fridge, we were pretty quickly running out, so by the time Under had left and I was whipping up dinner, we were left with only four beers per person and a tiny bit of schnapps.. Which wasn’t  looking too good as we were apparently about to play host to a pre-Uboat get-together for Penny (who was out looking for a good time) and Jens (who was, at the time, rather drunk and incoherent and not knowing what to do with himself other than either partying on or going home and passing out).

The solution to the above problem seemed rather simple. Penny seemed so stoked to get out and get his drink on that all we basically had to do was write him and go “Umm.. Halp?” and he then agreed to hook us up.. Meaning that, when he showed up a few hours later, he came packing about half a liter of Captain Morgan and whatever was left of a bottle of Jägermeister that he happened to have laying around. Jens, in return, showed up with a six-pack and a good buzz and so everybody was happy for a good while. Dunkel dove into the Morgan, I did a few shots of jäger and another beer or two. Jens had his beer and Penny, of course, wanted nothing but Captain and Coke.. Add to this a fair bunch of metal, punk and other good music and we were pretty well set for a few hours of partying.

At 9 PM we decided, running low on booze again, we decided that it was a pretty good idea  not to miss happy hour at the Uboat, so mixing up a dangerous cocktail of half and half Captain and Coke, we headed off on the three minute walk from Dunkel’s to the Uboat, finishing the damn thing on the way.. A ritual I participated in only after much peer pressure as I’ve grown to hate Captain and Coke over the years. Hey, what can I say? Synthetic sweet drinks just isn’t my thing anymore.. But down it went all the same.

We arrived at the Uboat a few minutes later, in single file and apparent true rockstar fashion as Dunkel and I, long hair and all, went in first with Penny and Jens staggering in behind us. The whole thing must’ve made some impression, because the first thing we heard coming in were a couple of girls going “Oh, my fucking God!” under their breath.. Which I’m not sure whether is a good thing or a bad thing, but apparently it goes to show that our reputation precedes us at the Uboat.. Which I’ll just take as being a good thing coz that’s the way we fucking roll. We made a quick greeting shaking hands and saying hi to the regulars, then kicked things off in a reasonable pace by ordering two beers each (gotta love happy hour) and settling down to talk with Champ, Svart and some of their friends for a while.. This went on all nice, quiet and civilized for a while before the guys decided to join forces, collect their joint savings and sending Svart and I up to order a total of 36 beers (as I said, gotta LOVE happy hour). This venture turned out  a lot harder than expected as the girls behind the bar for some reason refused to serve us more than four beers per person and I had a pretty hard time explaining to them that four of them were for me, the other four for Svart, the four of them for the one guy in the back, the next four for the next guy in the back and so on and so forth. In the end, they just gave up, we won, and walked off with our beers.. Of which I got like one before slipping off even further back to talk a bit of hard rock with Salah, Ulrik and some other guy.. Who I didn’t know, but who had spotted me at the Iron Maiden show this summer.. Golly, I feel so (in)famous sometimes! And even more so a while later when I’d drifted up to another part of the Uboat and a few out of towners came up, extending their hands and thanking me for the good times we’d had at an after-party following a performance at the Student House a year or more ago.. I apparently leave a lasting expression on people.. I don’t know, apparently I was just really popular that evening.

Which was quite well documented by the number of people that wanted to talk to me, compliment me on my style or just buy me a beer either on account of me being cool or doing cool and/or stupid stuff such as complimenting Jimmi on the (questionable) performance of his two favorite football teams – which earned me not only two beers from Penny but also a laugh from Jimmi. I ended up sharing the one beer with Dunkel who looked like he was in need of doing a chug-off with me and happily accepted the challenge.

Eventually at around 1-2 AM, the crowd started thinning out. We first lost Penny, then Dunkel, then a fuckload of other people. In the end I was left at the bar with Michael K, one of his friends, the Junker twins (of KFC support fame) and a bunch of other people.. Including Daphne’s boyfriend, Claus, who came up to me at some point gave me a grand, big hug and yelled “Yeah, Blue Öyster Cult, baby!” While somewhat of a fan myself, this confused me a bit, until Claus continued “Like acid and oil on a mad man’s face.. I never expected anyone to get that!” at which point I vaguely remember something about him putting that part of the lyrics to the BOC song “Astronomy” as his status on Facebook and me commenting in an approving manner.. Why he’d think he was the only person in the world who knew that particular song by BOC, especially after Metallica covered it like ten years back, I never figured out, but he seemed reasonably impressed and happy faced with the fact that I’d understood his reference so I just went with the flow and toasted a few times to my awesomeness with him until he kinda started wobbling around and making comments about being fuck off drunk and needing to get home. I tried to make him stay but his friends did not approve of this, so off he went and I returned to the bar, feeling reasonably on a roll after talking classic rock for a while, so I decided I’d try to grab control of the music and play me some classic rock.. A feat I actually succeeded in for the second time in two weeks.. And soon I had a surprising amount of people jamming along to The Who’s epic “Baba O’Riley” which is probably better known by the working title “Teenage Wasteland” or even better as the theme of CSI: NY (can anyone explain to me what it is with CSI and The Who? They use their songs for like every show). The nature of the rest of my set kinda alludes me on account of me having been partying and drinking for 16 hours straight at the time and was well into my 25th beer or something along those lines.. Or, come to think of it, I probably was drinking “Sons’o’bitches” (aka Cult Shakers, long story, don’t ask) with Michael at this point.. But anyways I remember there being some “A Little Respect”, some “AC/DC” and a bunch of other stuff in there.. Much to the joy of the people present at the time.. For some reason.

After a long, long day, I eventually grew very weary and returned home at around 5 AM, dropping a rather incoherent text to Tina about the goings on of the day, and one to my mom assuring me that I had not been burglarized or violated by some escaped criminal from the local jail.. Which is pretty much in my back yard. I never really did figure out what this was all about, but she did send me a text early in the evening telling me that someone had escaped, was considered armed and dangerous and that I should stay inside.. Apparently I forgot all about replying to this so it was at this time, around 5 AM that I decided that I’d maybe better drop her a note to let her know I was okay.. Y’know, just in case she’d be worrying or anything.

I then checked up on Facebook, email, and whatever needed checking before settling in for a night of blissful sleep following a day of epic, drunken adventures.


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